A year ago today, I took the plunge and traded in my desk job and telephone headset for a microphone and lifestyle as a full-time wedding and events singer. It's been a huge year, filled with more opportunities than I could've predicted, endless learning, lots of stress and a whole lot more singing! Taking the leap into self employment is a blessing in many ways but it's also not for the faint hearted. So to one year ago me, or anyone else dreaming of ditching the 9-5 for a life of their own, wedding singer or not. Let's spill the tea on what it's really like. Buckle up, it's a long-ish one.
(This is of course all derived from my own personal experience and is not to say that anyone else would experience self-employment as I have done so far and yes, I did have to put that disclaimer out there).
Being Your Own Boss - I think this is perhaps the foremost and most obvious pro that comes into mind when anyone shares their self-employed status. Being in charge of your own time. I'm not the first and certainly won't be the last person to argue that the stereotypical 9-5, 5 days a week, 40 hour+ work week in these modern times isn't the only way to work anymore or necessary in some cases. In fact it can be argued that said schedule can be damaging to productivity. Yes, as a wedding and events singer I have bookings in my diary which dictate how my week is going to look as a basic rule of thumb. But ultimately I am in charge of my time in more ways than one. First up, I've actively chosen this job. It's not something that I've unconsciously or accidentally ended up doing by default. It’s all deliberate, which automatically brings fourth a sense of motivation to get up in the morning. With weekend bookings usually in tow, I also have the freedom to decide how I want my week days to look. Hello, regular morning and exercise routines, it's been a while. While always taking time to prioritise what I need to get done for my business. I love the flexibility of being able to mix my week up to how I need/want them to be. No dreading the weekly rota dictating my schedule, clocking in and out or rush hour traffic for an 8am start. I have the freedom, to book in a hair appointment at mid-day on a Wednesday should I dare to, have my lunch when I'm actually hungry or god forbid start my workday at 1pm! Not everyone functions at their best between the strict the exclusive hours of 9am-5pm. Some days, strokes of genius and motivation occur at 7pm or 7am. As long as the work gets done, which it does, that's all that matters to me. There's also the bliss of deciding when I'm allowed to take time off. Forgive me for delving into my slightly rebellious mindset, but something doesn't quite sit right with me about having to bargain or compete with lets call her "Sandra from finance" to make sure that you can get Christmas Eve off to enjoy with your family or feeling shame for having a sick day.
But here's the caveat, and remember we're being honest here. Being your own boss is hard. Yes, it allows the grace to be the good guy and shape your own reality day to day. But that also means that from my own experience, that you also have to be the bad guy. It's much easier to vilify your "grumpy boss" rather than yourself. Not only do you have to pay attention to your needs as a human of course. But as your own boss you need to know what your business needs as a separate entity. At all times. It can be difficult to separate the two especially as a one woman band, or many service based businesses. You are literally your business. For example, I may not have to ask anyone whether I'm allowed to take a Saturday off to celebrate my besties birthday. But if I'm behind on meeting my monthly quota, sure I can have the day off. I then also have to be strict with myself to make sure I do all that I can to either save the potential money lost or book myself another gig to cover it. And this job in particular, with weekend work being the majority. It means that some sacrifices, usually of the social kind, will have to be made. It comes with a sense of realism that not many people talk about when speaking about their self-employed experience rather than the idillic dreamy vision that many of us (myself included) have had.
As well as being the bad cop. Rather than being just one cog in the machine, being self-employed makes you the whole damn factory. Singer by name, social media expert, videographer, editor, financial manager, chauffeur, administrator and more by default. And to put it simply, if you don't do the work, the work won't get done. This is something that I personally found incredibly overwhelming, especially in my first few months. I no longer have the safety net of an employment contract or team of workers alongside me, to pick up the slack when needed. It was all down to me. Whether successful or a failure, the title "sole trader", looms large. Perhaps this time next year I'll be in a position where I can delegate certain tasks and hire some extra hands to help, but for the mean time my business isn't ready for that. So to combat this on going, running on a hamster-like, anxious feeling. I have to set myself business boundaries. Telling myself on a daily basis (in an encouraging, coaching tone of course). You've got to be on it and you've got to be organised. Set yourself a yes, flexible, but efficient and effective schedule. Check in on your goals, status and progress and constantly evaluate. Otherwise, overwhelm and mistakes will happen. Oh yeah, and on the rare occasion when those mistakes do happen...guess who's the fall guy? That's right. You. There's no-one else to hide behind. No company name, or management team to fight your corner. Which for some people, is incredibly scary and an off putting factor alone. It's something I've actually started to lean into over the past year. I call it "putting my big girl pants on" and having to deal with issues head on. Rather than having the luxury of leaving the work at the office. A luxury which sometimes I admittedly miss.
What's A Pension lol? Another unexpected challenge of self-employment that I've found, is managing finances. Not from a cashflow point of view. In fact I've always been pretty good with managing my money. And to deviate for a second from this point, I'm now actually making more money than would've ever been possible in my previous employment. No price cap on earnings here thank you very much. But a difficulty I've found is more so in the "adulting" style financial management. Basically, taxes and pensions. Unlike a traditional job where taxes are automatically deducted, I've had to adjust to the reality of sitting on my hard-earned money and then actively having to save and then part with a chunk of it for the taxman. I also have to be diligent in understanding the self-employed tax system and tracking expenses and income with a magnifying glass. (Why don't they teach this stuff in school?!). And although I recently invested in a fabulous accounting software which has been a godsend. Let's be honest, as a creative, it's all bit of a snooze fest.
Speaking of honesty and here's where the full disclosure comes. I don't have a pension. You heard me, I'm approaching 30 and I have nothing in the pot. This is due to many factors outside of being self-employed. Such as part-time employment/previous contract work. But this is a terrifying thought. It's now mandatory for employers to enrol you into a pension scheme and to contribute a percentage into it. Simply for existing in their companies! Which over a lifetime of full time employment, is a pretty cushty contribution. Oh yeah, there's also no such thing as included health benefits, sick pay or holiday pay. However, to make sure that 60 year old me isn't living on the street, I know that I need to do my research and get this changed. It's on my to do list to look for advice and the different options for me figure out a plan of action. Have I perhaps been procrastinating such a daunting task? Yes. Like I said, terrifying thought. But I know that the longer I leave it, the worse it could potentially get. Therefore it's a high priority on the list to sort out in year number 2, okay!?
The Learning Never Stops
Now this part is where we separate the players from the game and in my opinion a fundamental attribute to being a self employed success.The learning never stops and you have to be willing to accept the fact that you will never know it all. You may be your own boss, but don't let your ego take charge. If you want your business to grow, you have to reflect on what it is you're struggling with and either reach out for help, or do the research. Which can be hard, time consuming and a head fudge. You also have to be honest with yourself and be able to admit your short comings and failure. Whereas some folk may find this ongoing inner work too much. I'd probably say that the constant learning is my favourite thing. I find a thrill in meeting a road bump and overcoming it. With many of my previous job roles, after the first few months I personally found an almost glass ceiling in terms what what I was allowed to learn or progress in. Being forced to stay in the box of my job title, I felt very trapped and restricted. However, through self-employment I yes, will always have more to learn, ergo have more tasks to do. But as a self proclaimed growth mindset gal. I therefore actually find joy in seeing my progression and learning new things. This nicely leads on to another personal attribute that I've developed, due to being self-employed. A new found sense of trust and confidence within myself. I've never really been known to be a "slacker" over all. But as I've only had myself to rely on this past year to literally survive financially. I've felt the fear induced procrastination shivers many a times yet have found a way to push through (with kindess ofc). Every time I show up for myself, my clients and my business over time it develops a new level of pride, identity or subconscious re-script in my head that "I know I'll get it done!". I trust myself to not only work, but have the courage to push myself out of my comfort zone and take little leaps of faith, if it means potentially benefitting my business. It's a sense of play that I don't think I had a year ago. Which of course spills into many different parts of my life too. It's a trickle effect from having the guts to take such a huge leap initially and leave my office job. Making every other, slightly perceived risk, not even that scary. I do have a my anxious moments of course. (My ever supportive boyfriend will testify to that). There will always be that tiny imposter syndrome style devil on my shoulder, contemplating whether what I'm doing is sustainable for long-term life, comparing me to others in my field or to those I left behind, and telling me that I'm not good enough. But the more I do this job, find my feet, find my voice and experience live as a self-employed business woman, the volume of that voice whimpers down with each continued successful and survived month. As I finish writing this blog on a Wednesday evening (post 5pm, shock) while sunbathing in a park after a successful afternoon of gigging. Unsure whether I’d get this post complete within my time frame…but lo and behold here we are. I’m assured in the choice I made a year ago. My life is controversial some may say, but for me right now I think I’m doing a good job at this self employed-ness. Who know's where I'll be in another 12 months time or even in 5 years. We never know what's around the corner for us, or this industry the good or bad (thanks Covid for reminding us of this). But regardless of whether I'm still a self-employed singer in 5 years time or something completely unimaginably different. I'll have with me for life: the fact that I've not only taken a risk, but followed my own truth, desires and made the whole thing sustainable for AT LEAST a year. So, well done to me I guess! :)
All the best,
Abbi-Kaye (Viva la Vintage)
(Me somewhat one year ago living the office life)
(Me now in my own home office/singing studio living my self employed life)
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